SpartanNerd Unboxing and Review…Minecraft Steve with Diamond Armor

Someone’s been a hopping down the Easter Trail at the SpartanNerd household…and bringing brightly colored, low rez goodies!

Lets have a look at Steve..the hero from Minecraft.

I am going to have to admit something.  I don’t really get Minecraft.  And I remind the SpartanSmurfs constantly that there must not be a point to a game if you don’t score points or save a princess.  But they contend that it is the lack of a mission that makes the game fun.

Whatever.  I’ll say it again.  Kids these days don’t know how to game!

OOPS.  A little rant.  Back to the review.

This toy comes in this box.


You can clearly see the contents.  Notably, there is only the word MINECRAFT on the bottom, with no character name or description.  Instead that information is at the top of the blister card.  The #2 at the top indicates that this toy is from series 2.

And the back?


Here you get a little more info, a battle pose for “Steve”, and a look at some other products in this series.

So, lets open this up and throw away the box!

statue steve

Here is Steve, fully assembled and standing on his block.

Here is a shot of all the pieces.


The SpartanSmurfs tell me that this block isn’t a block.  It is “Diamond Ore.”  OK.  Looks like a block to me.  Notice the helmet and sword.  They are blue…this is supposed to be the diamond color.  This Steve is in Diamond Armor, after all.

I assure you readers, that the parts of the a figure come apart easily for customization.  But SpartanSmurf #2 forbid me to take him apart and photograph him….

This helmet almost got lost on Easter, when SpartanSmurf #2 was running down a hill at my grandma’s house, while holding the figure, and fell down, dropping the helmet in some thick clover.  Good thing I have sharp eyes…(this time I was just lucky.)

Here are a few more poses by said SpartanSmurf #2.

sitting steve

They sit around and play Minecraft. Now Minecraft sits around and plays you!

limbo steve

It is apparently funny to make every action figure do the limbo…


fighting steve

Remember this, from the back of the box?


Because I am so clueless and unenthusiastic about this game, I asked them to give me 10 things to say about this figure.  Here is the information, verbatim.  Keep in mind, I don’t pretend to purport this information as accurate.  And because an 8 year old and a 12 year old told me what to write, it might have some opinion and bias, as well as inaccuracies.  That disclaimer delivered, her goes:

  • Steve has Diamond Armor
  • a diamond sword. It can hit for seven hearts of damage. against any enemy. a skeleton and villager take 3. You can fight against other players….Ender Dragon takes about 200 sword hits. The Wither takes about 300. However, the SpartanSmurfs are not truly certain. Herobrine takes 307
  • Removable helmet. Made of diamond. Provides protection from his head…adding 2 to his armor class. The rest of the armor is diamond. The chest plate is about 4. The leggings are about 3. the boots are about 2. All of this is the most protection you can have.
  • To get the armor you have to mine a lot of diamonds. Maybe about 20 diamonds to get the full armor. Diamond is very hard to find. It is the second rarest item on the game, after emerald.
  • I am told there is a command that lets you switch between game modes. This is how SpartanSmurf #2 has acquired such a rare armor.
  • When you are hurt, your armor loses durability. Your hands, you face, and back of your neck are unprotected.
  • SpartanSmurf #1 says that he saved a village from 1000 zombies that he spawned in creative and then switched to survival with the diamond getup.
  • You have to modify the diamond armor and sword with an enchantment table….You can make it have thorns for instance. Or the weapons can deal fire damage.
  • An Anvil lets you use a spell book, which you can use to specifically enchant something. And you can even give unlimited enchantments.
  • It looks very cool, and becomes sky-blue and shiny if enchanted. This is the best thing about the way it looks.


OK.  Now for my opinion.  About the figure.  I mean, that’s all I can really do.

Steve has less articulation than a Lego Mini-figure.  But he still gives you the vibe that he could be one if he were smaller.  His arms move on a circular joint, he has no wrist articulation.  His legs also only move back and forth.  He does have a torso/waist twist.  His head can turn all the way around.  He comes with a helmet, a shield, a sword, and a piece of “Diamond Ore.”

I personally wouldn’t buy or want to buy something like this for myself.  I prefer super articulated figures.  And let’s face it.  I have NO ATTACHMENT TO MINECRAFT!  Did I mention that this guy is valued at around $15?  Why?  Demand, I suppose.

I tried to play it a couple of times…I don’t get it.  And I wasn’t immersed in the world like a game should do.  However, the kids nowadays really are into it.  And It seems to be a clean game.  I know that there are some hoaxes about the game going around…the aforementioned “Herobrine” is one of them apparently.

So my rating for Steve with Diamond Armor from Minecraft is 1/5.  What’s yours?  (This is the lowest I have ever rated anything, I believe.)

One thought on “SpartanNerd Unboxing and Review…Minecraft Steve with Diamond Armor

  1. Let’s face it. The main question that everyone had going into Suicide Squad was whether or not this film would resurrect a fumbling DC movie universe. Will this be the film where they burst everything wide open and take over the world or would this be another questionable

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s