The NY Toy Fair was this past week, and the big news about Masters of the Universe…most everything is ON PAUSE for 2026, deferred to marketing for the movie. MASTERVERSE is “On Pause”, and almost all of Origins is also…some of them just started like the 200x Cartoon Collection. “On Pause”. Transformers Origins Crossover. “On Pause”. Turtles of Grayskull just ended anyway, but there is a Thundercats thing. “On Pause.”
I really hope the movie does well. The toys they have revealed look cool. They are more in the scale of GI Joe Classified, and they are proportioned similarly as they are based on real human actors. It is a whole new system of articulation also. And there is a kids line coming out called “core” or something like that, not “the first ones” as was going around about a week ago. Both lines look pretty good. There are some things, like Tri-Klops not having a sword and Battle Cat’s armor looking stupid. There are a lot of really cool things like Trap Jaw and Idris Elba Man-At-Arms.
But putting MASTERVERSE “on pause” is a mistake.
We don’t have:
a non-Kevin Smith Orko
a non=Kevin Smith Battle Cat
Tri-Sorceress and He-Man husband and wife 2-pack
Sorceress of Havoc (she would be awesome!)
Rio Blast
Extendar
Rokkon
Stonedar
Zoar
Screech
King Hiss
Tongue Lasher
Sssqueeeze
Rattlor
Yeah there’s a lot more I could add here. AND I can complain. Why did we get Anti-Eternia He-Man instead of one of the above-listed figures? Why do we have four versions of Beast Man and Mer-Man but no re-issues of Buzz Off or Stratos? Why do we have Motherboard and not a vehicle? Or for that matter the other giant figures? MASTERVERSE had all of this to accomplish, but now it is “on pause.” What about the 1987 movie figures? There was only one short window where we could get Blade, and I missed him. There was a lot more they could have done here.
The SpartanNerd’s collector display shelf.
And there are two competing outcomes.
If the movie does well, everything becomes some shade of the Chronicles line. More He-Man and Skeletor variants. More Beast Man and Man-At-Arms variants. More Teela and Evil-Lyn. And some of the characters I listed above…ignored. And the MASTERVERSE style of toy, which was kind of serving in my mind as something evergreen like Hot Wheels or Barbie, is just outright replaced. (This is the best outcome I think. I hope the movie does well.)
If the movie tanks. (A very likely scenerio). Masters of the Universe goes back underground like it did after the failure of the 1987 movie. Mattel will not support it…they have a lot invested in the success of the film. As awesome as it looks to me , an enthusiastic fan, the moviegoing regular sheeple will probably not see this so much as better than a Star Wars or Marvel movie, (both of which have been suffering for a while).
Maybe this movie will find some of that Super Mario Bros. movie or Barbie movie magic from recent years, and will knock us all out with its awesome story and special effects. Maybe it will be what the fans have always wanted and the moviegoers didn’t know they needed in their lives. But I am 60% expecting “Rise of the Beasts” or “The Last Jedi.”
“On Pause”
I believe “On Pause” is a soft way of telling us they are killing the line. Someone might say, “They wouldn’t do that! Not with so much more stuff to cover!” But they would…they already have done this…look no further than Masters of the Universe Mega Books, (or Mega Constructs, or just MEGA.). Whatever. That brick shop that was promised has given us some Hot Wheels models. They haven’t done anything with Masters of the Universe in years, and that line was VERY incomplete…they even released the Central Eternia Tower, but never the Viper Tower of the Grayskull Tower. If they can leave ends like that loose, you can bet we won’t get any MASTERVERSE Snake Men.
I am on a roll picking up the Rawhides subgroup of GI Joes from the 1987 movie. I have Jinx, Tunnel Rat, Law and Order, and now their drill sergeant, Beach Head. (I need to get Lt. Falcon, Big Lob, and Chuckles, if anyone is counting).
I saw this Retro Cardback Beach Head at LT Toys in Columbia SC, and decided it was the perfect time to get one of the GI Joe Classified Series Retro Cardback figures.
As this is my first one, lets take a hard look at the package, which should be a bigger deal than the normal Classified Series stuff.
I mean…it looks like a toy from the 1980’s in modern collectors sensibilities. I have seen a few of these warming the pegs at Walmart…usually Cover Girl or Scarlett. I don’t know why the lady figures don’t sell so well? I seem to enjoy quite a few over the past couple of years. Back to Beach Head, you have a nice illustration with the classic explosion behind him. You can see the figure very well in his bluster bubble, as well as all of his accessories. Really…holding this in hand also brings back some memories. Let’s flip it over…
On the surface, it looks like a cardback from the 1980’s, but dig a little bit to see some differences. There is cross sell art, which is similar, but I don’t know who these characters are, and it doesn’t say who. The bio takes up most of the cardback, and I remember being a kid and cutting these out, only for them to usually get thrown away probably by my mom. She was generally against us having GI Joes by the way. Terrified of guns or that we would join the army. I have an uncle who almost made it to general, and so there we go…another draw towards the military that I am pretty sure scared her to death. I never joined up, but I strongly considered after 9/11. However, my son did go into the infantry, and worries US to death.
Back to the cardback…this bio barely gives us any information. Instead, we get a little bit in five languages. I absolutely think they should print this for other languages…that isn’t what I am saying. I wish a more fleshed out bio wasn’t sacrificed for the real estate on this card it takes to print five languages. (If they did print a different card for each language, that is even more incentive for people to chase down the variants…just saying!)
I love this package enough to keep the cardback. Important to note, it isn’t a collector’s friendly package. I used a pocket knife to cut the blister off without damaging the card. I saw where it is possible to use a hairdryer. I’ll keep the card with any others I pick up and keep using it as a diorama for YouTube videos, etc.
WHAT DO WE GET IN THE PACKAGE?
Beach Head Figure
Backpack
Bandolier
Pair of daggers
Crossbow
Pair of tear gas grenades
Pistol with silencer
Submachine gun (Demro XF-7 Wasp?)
Figure Stand
I kind of thought the retro-cardback style was another way to sell the core characters to nostalgia chasers, and use less plastic (parts and accessories). But that doesn’t seem to be the case with Beach Head. This is pretty much the exact same thing I would have expected from the more classic Classified Series packaging.
FIGURE REVIEW
PICTURED: GI Joe Classified Series Cobra Commander and Retro Cardback Beach Head
Beach Head has all of the same articulation you would expect. BUT my example has a stiff right knee that has a top joint that doesn’t want to move. I used the hair dryer and got it to go, but it is still very stiff. Otherwise he has a ball-jointed head on a posable neck, butterfly joints on the shoulders, bicep swivels, double jointed elbows, swivel wrists with rubbery hands. Ab crunch, waist twist, ball jointed hips, double jointed knees, boot cut shins, rocker ankles. Everything you would expect from a Classified Series figure.
Beach Head is wearing what I would describe as riot gear, however he is clearly an Army Ranger. He has this rubber flack jacket and ammo utility belt. There are red details on the shoulders which I believe are padding because of the weight of this armor and backpack, but it also could be some kind of storage. He has a poster for his pistol, which has a silencer also. There are sheaths for his two daggers…this is very welcome considering that Law and Order didn’t come with a sheath. He doesn’t have a proper way of storing the crossbow or machine gun on his armor.
His sculpt is very good. Mostly this is a uniform sculpt, like the recent Jinx figure I reviewed. You aren’t seeing a lot of human figure, but instead are seeing the costume. In the case of Beach Head, his most iconic look is this look. Military uniform from head to toe, always wearing a ski mask. But it is a great sculpt. You can see the elastic details on his shirt, the ridges on his mask, and the pants look like natural pants. (These have been used before…Sergeant Slaughter has the same pants and deco)
The paint is an area I thought this retro cardback figure might skimp on. It’s true that the accessories could use more paint, but the figure doesn’t seem to have suffered. All of the paint on this figure is well done. There is some of the “molded in colored plastic” effect that does some of the work.
Beach Head inspects the Rawhides. PICTURED: GI Joe Classified Series Jinx, Law, and Tunnel Rat. MIA Lt. Falcon, Big Lob, and Chuckles. I have a feeling I will be getting Big Lob soon…
You can see in the above photo that Beach Head, being from the Retro Cardback, isn’t the least bit worse than the other three.
ACCESSORIES
Beach Head is absolutely loaded. I believe his best accessory is the submachine gun. BUT…it needs more paint apps. It’s true that it captures what the vintage figure came with. But like I said before, it is in the accessories where the paint apps are lacking. This machine gun has a muzzle break and a magazine, both removable. And his hands are very rubbery, allowing you to pose him holding it without problems. Notable, this figure did not come with alternate hands like so many others, but these rubbery hands are a good workaround. This gun, reportedly a Demro FX-7 Wasp, isn’t normally military. I looked it up, and it was possibly used in Vietnam, where actually American military issued weapons were not allowed. But in general, this is more of a police weapon.
PICTURED: All GI Joe Classified Series figures. Cold Slither (Dreadnoks Zartan, Buzzer, Torch, and Ripper), Zarana, and GI Joe Beach Head.
His pistol is average for GI Joe. The bandolier…I am told that this pouch thing he is holding is just that. It holds three ammo cans. You can attach the tear gas grenades to it also. his backpack appears to have the arrows for the crossbow sculpted in. Internet research says that this backpack has a mine detector.
PICTURED: Turtles of Grayskull Skull-Shredder vs. GI Joe Classified Shooter and Beach Head. It looks like they have him with their pistols, but we all know it won’t be that simple…Also pictured my favorite cover of Turtles of Grayskull #1 and the most recent Energon Universe GI Joe story, where the Joes recruit Roadblock. (was that a spoiler?)
SPARTANNERD RATING OF GI JOE CLASSIFIED RETRO CARDBACK BEACH HEAD
Sculpt- Point
Paint- Point
Accessories- Point
Articulation- Taking a point off because of his knee issues
the feels point- You know it!
Yeah, Beach Head gets the feels point all day because of that special scene in the 1987 GI Joe movie. I recently watched it again just because that movie is awesome…I had it on Beta Max when I was a little kid and watched this movie all of the time…easily once a week. But the best scene in the movie isn’t Nemesis Enforcer, or even the opening music video (though that is undeniably awesome). It is the scene between Jinx and Beach Head. And I am going to write my feelings right now, and you’ll know why I needed Beach Head so much, and also why he gets the Feels Point, even though the SpartanNerd is a Cobra fan.
First of all, Beach Head is inspecting the new recruits, dubbed Rawhides. These are six new bodies being injected into GI Joe by Hasbro, but I digress. Beach Head gives them a looking over and blah, blah, blah Lt. Falcon is AWOL. Jinx is among them. Beach Head trains Big Lob and Tunnel Rat, but then meets Jinx in her training area, which looks kind of ninja-cabin-ish. She is working her katas or something. Here he accuses her of being bad luck, and then she makes a kissy face at him. He doesn’t like this at all, and proceeds to beat her up and then using the gladiator pole shoved in her face says “$#1+ ! Pathetic!” Yep. On a straight to TV movie. I would normally not like this except for what happens next.
As Beach Head begins to leave, she puts on her blindfold and breaks the training pole in two, then beats Beach Head down.
And there you have it. Beach Head gets the feels point. There has never been a time when this movie was on that I didn’t stop what I was doing…almost like saying the Pledge of Allegiance, and just take it in.
So I award GI Joe Classified Series Retro Cardback Beach Head a 4/5. He only loses a point because of his knee problem, but I guess the SpartanNerd loses that point also!
Do you agree or disagree, Hub City Geeks? Let me know in the comments!
spartannerd 