Tag Archives: Kevin Smith

Masters of the Universe 2026 Movie- SpartanNerd’s Review

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This is a review with SPOILERS. You can see my video review of this movie if you click this link HERE.

First of all, I was one who for years has said that if they do a Masters of the Universe movie in the modern style of Marvel and DC, Star Wars, or Transformers, then they will certainly ruin it. I like the Michael Bay Transformers movies (at least the first two) but have some objections to things, like for instance Optimus Prime chopping peoples heads off. You see how I didn’t talk about the “insect-formers” design…I came to enjoy it. And while Marvel has mostly hit it right and DC getting it sometimes, everyone who reads this blog surely knows about all of the controversy around Star Wars starting with Disney. I figured a MOTU movie would have statements and content that rub the SpartanNerd the wrong way, like the movies Rise of the Beasts and The Last Jedi. I figured there might be “bad CGI” like in Aquaman.

But all of my fears were mostly wrong. This movie addresses Masters of the Universe in a modern style very well. The acting is top notch, and if the CGI is a little off, I feel that the producers wanted it to be like that to remind us that this is largely based on a Filmation cartoon from the 1980’s, I say mostly. It was a good move to stick to the Filmation fanbase. Watching that cartoon and playing with action figures are the things that the 40-something year-old fandom remember best. Mattel and Amazon needed to skew away from the super-nerds like me, and cater to a general audience of more casual fans. I am going to break this down.

  • Idris Elba’s Man-At-Arms is an incredible character, and Elba and the producers did something different with Duncan while maintaining the “mentor” aspect essential to who he is.
  • Jared Leto’s Skeletor was a surprise to me. I hadn’t heard his voice…it isn’t the same as Filmation or Mike Young Productions nasally voice. Instead it is a deeper voice with Shakespearean elements. Skeletor is overdramatic and retains his comedic villain self, but is also someone that everyone walks on eggshells around.
  • Allison Brie’s Evil-Lyn was kind of the exact same character that Brie plays as a wrestler on the Netflix show GLOW. In that show, she is an actor playing a wrestler with the character of “The Mad Russian” or something stereotypically grating. But when you see her go from her normal self to wrestler lady…that is where Evil-Lyn is. It is important to say that I don’t believe she was written to be as strong of a character as Meg Foster played in the 1987 movie.
  • Nick Galitzine’s Adam Glenn…that’s right…not Adam of the House of Randor. I have never seen this actor in anything before. I believe he is a little bit too small to play He-Man. He has muscles…that isn’t it…but they aren’t Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Conan the Barbarian muscles. Adam is a can’t-do-anything-right who becomes OP when he transforms into He-Man. Are Adam and He-Man different people? No…I think this is partially on what the movie hinges on. He-Man is inside of Adam. The movie handles this idea without hitting us over the head with it.
  • Camila Mendez’s Teela is a headstrong friend for Adam, the same as always.
  • Of the evil warriors, Trap-Jaw has at least THREE big fight scenes. Which brings up fight scenes…this movie feels like a bunch of action figures fighting against each other! Besides Skeletor, he is easily the strongest of the villains. We see the others fighting…Spikor has plenty of humorous scenes where his spikes are more of a liability. And there are scores of skeleton guys and monster men who are just fodder. Review of Chronicles Trap Jaw coming soon!
  • The Eternian Family- Randor and Marlena are indeed presented as Adam’s parents in the opening, with Randor being way too hard on Adam as he trains. Marlena doesn’t get much, but when it is time to protect Adam, she helps him get to Castle Grayskull.
  • Castle Grayskull and Snake Mountain…these places don’t feel as epic or weighty as they should. They are overshadowed by the drama of the relationships between the characters.
  • Vehicles- They didn’t give us much. A bunch of Fright Fighters and Rotons, along with Teela’s Talon Fighter and a Sky Sled. The Collector gets a moment, and the good guys show up with a bunch of generic ships.
  • The good guys…do you call them the Masters? There is a lot of self-deprecating humor.
  • Cringer- Really, Battle Cat doesn’t appear until the final scene. Cringer is a reluctant scaredy cat like he is supposed to be, but he also fights pretty hard against Beast Man. (Review of Chronicles Battle Cat HERE.)

So this brings up one of the criticisms. There is a lot of humor in this movie. Like every couple of minutes there is a jab, joke, pun, or zinger. This is in line with The Guardians of the Galaxy or Deadpool. It isn’t horribly dirty humor like Deadpool, but it is on the innuendo side, and as far as language there is a GD right at the beginning of the movie that makes Reverend SpartanNerd feel like throwing up.

THE PLOT- MAJOR SPOILERS!

Adam was sent to Earth by the Sorceress at the suggestion of Marlena during the opening attack on the palace. Part of this opening attack was Man-At-Arms being defeated by Trap Jaw and Randor being captured by Skeletor. Adam was separated from the sword when he exited the portal…touching the sword was his way home! Luckily, Adam never forgot where he came from, but as an Earthling he had a hard time adjusting to the boring life of Human Resources. I believe Adam Glenn works at a staffing agency, where he is good with people and helps them find a place in the workforce that is a fit for them. But he gets roasted by his boss, Susie, who has a problem with him looking for the Power Sword on the clock. Adam gets ghosted by “Julie,” advice at the gym from Dolph Lundgren, and admonished by his roommate Hussein. He gets a text at work to find the sword at a toy store called “The Fright Zone” and on touching it, a signal was sent to Eternia, where both Teela and Beast Man received it. The Earth scene really doesn’t take long in the movie…probably less than fifteen minutes.

On Eternia, Adam is worthless as a fighter. The good guys disbelieve Teela enough to throw her in jail along with Adam. Fisto seems to be the leader, with Ram Man second in charge. Mekanek and Moss Man are around also. In jail, Man-At-Arms is passed out drunk, and Roboto is a maid. I believe this scene takes place at Point Dread? Skeletor’s army attacks the base, and Roboto helps them bust out. Once again Adam is useless, and as Trap Jaw comes out, Man-At-Arms begins to have a panic attack. But Adam raises the sword and becomes He-Man, having a brutal fight with Trap Jaw and ripping off his arm, then using it to shoot down Skeletor’s army. There is a vehicle chase as Teela, Man-At-Arms, Adam, and Roboto escape in the Talon Fighter, only to be shot down. Skeletor stands there wondering who the new barbarian is that took out his men. Skeletor has all of the Masters taken to prison at Snake Mountain.

At the crash sight of the Talon Fighter, Adam and Teela have a tender moment as he picks up the ship with one arm, (but he does complain that it is heavy). Man-At-Arms breaks out his foot locker and puts on his armor, that has a flask hidden in the front of the chest plate that as kids we always wanted to know what that was. He says he would rather be a drunk than a failure. Skeletor appears in a hologram just like in the 1987 movie telling the new barbarian to come to Snake Mountain and surrender the sword to see his parents. Apparently they had crashed near the secret passageway to Snake Mountain…

Goat Man is guarding the entranceway, but Adam gets by him. At Snake Mountain’s iconic mouth, Skeletor has Randor. He-Man decides to fight, and another huge battle takes place, but Evil-Lyn traps him with a force field. He-Man breaks the spell with his incredible strength, but the shock causes the roof to collapse on everyone except for him. He rushes to save his dad, but his father dies. During the drama, Skeletor comes up behind He-Man and clocks him on the head with the Havoc Staff.

When Adam wakes up… yes…he was hit hard enough to revert back…he is in the Snake Mountain prison with all of the Masters. His Mother and Cringer are also there. Adam uses his Human Resources skills to rally the Masters to work together with their powers to break out.

Skeletor can’t make the power sword work. Evil-Lyn suggests taking it to Castle Grayskull to perform a ritual. The final battle takes place at Grayskull. Adam manages to get the sword from Skeletor, but before he can change, Skeletor blasts him with the Havoc Staff. Adam uses the sword to block, but the force breaks the sword. Skeletor uses the hilt with the shard-end of the sword to stab Adam in the chest. Then proceeds to read his mind.

As Skeletor reads his mind, he is dreaming about the gym, but instead of Dolph, it is Skeletor lifting weights, wearing an athletic hoodie! Next he is on the date with Julie, and Julie asks about Eternia. When Adam looks up, it is Skeletor wearing a dressy suit. he drags him out of the restaurant. Adam finds himself in Susie’s office, where she says something about having a performance review with Doug…when Adam looks over to where Doug was earlier in the movie, it is Skeletor drinking a thermos of coffee! (This was my favorite part of the whole movie!). Finally, Adam is passed out in his room, where Hussein comes in and places a drawing of the Sorcerss on his chest. Next Zoar flys in, and encourages him that He has the power…it isn’t really the sword!

This is enough to wake Adam wake up in the real world and remove the sword from his chest. As he begins to transform, the sword comes back together. And then instead of fighting, he tells Skeletor he just wants to talk. But Skeletor declines, saying that he is always going to be the villain. Adam actually punches Skeletor out like a boxing warmup, then turns on the Thunder Punches complete with lightning. Finally he palms the Havoc Staff like Michael Jordan, and then shatters it. The explosion is extremely powerful and appears to kill Skeletor as his skull bounces around on the floor.

The next scene is six months later. There is a celebration as Eternia has been rebuilt, which also includes Hussein. Adam gives everyone a pep talk. He also expresses his name as He-Man…the first time it appears in the movie. Then there is news of a problem at Avion. Adam and Cringer then run off to Grayskull to transform where nobody can see them, (but the characters question why?).

Three Credits scenes. The first is Orko presenting a moral that is something like “Muscle Guys are probably heroes and skull-faced guys are probably villains) as Mer-Man is arrested in the background. The second is a reveal of She-Ra about to attack the Fright Zone (Filmation design). And the final scene is Evil-Lyn returning to pick up Skeletor’s skull, and we hear him laughing maniacally.

MY THOUGHTS

You could take the first Thor movie and follow the plot…they are pretty identical, with Randor taking Odin’s place. There is also a little bit of Lion King in there. There’s just no doubt that Skeletor really takes this show. We saw more of Adam/He-Man, and it was good, but a reason to watch this is to watch Skeletor! I like how they started with the Man-At-Arms we expect, then deconstructed him and built him back up. Teela is also different in a way because this time she is compensating for her father giving up rather than the typical path to becoming the captain of the guard.

One thing…there is no origin story for Skeletor. There is no reason why he is evil. We get that he is greedy and power-hungry. Evil-Lyn serves as someone who can talk to him…the only person who CAN talk to him. And he is toxic to her, burning her skin with his hand in two scenes. But I question…do we really NEED to know why Skeletor is evil? Do we NEED a Keldor story? Do we NEED to know things like how old is Castle Grayskull? Where did the henchmen come from? Not really in my opinion. We didn’t know any of that in the Filmation show…we just took it for granted that Skeletor was evil and Castle Grayskull had to be protected. There was some canon to this story, like Marlena being from Earth and the Sorceress secretly being Teela’s mother (not directly addressed, but there). But for the most part, it was about seeing our favorite characters on the screen, probably fighting.

Some things that I appreciate…Roboto is a GIRL! Two of the Credits scenes are setups for sequels…We have references to the 1987 movie including Dolph Lundgren, The Great Eye of the Galaxy (did you catch it?), Pigboy, and Karg.

What did this movie add to the story of Masters of the Universe?

  • This is the first time we have ever seen Skeletor sleep
  • Skeletor is also is a mind-reader
  • Dian- This is a strong female character from the Newspaper strips. In Kevin Smith’s show there has been a strong female lead “Andra” recycled from the Filmation show. Dian is a similar character
  • Goat Man is now officially one of the Evil Warriors in my mind

SPARTANNERD RATING

As a MOVIE, I give this a 4/5. As a Masters of the Universe movie, I give it a 5/5. Not everyone is going to “get it.” There is a lot of talk about the viral movies Backrooms and Obsession…two sleeper movies that scored big at the box office, taking some market share. And this is unfortunately true…not even a fan-excuse (I saw Backrooms…it is pretty good!). Masters of the Universe is for 40-somethings, but Scary Movie 6/7 is for a 2000’s crowd. And up ahead is Toy Story 5, Moana (live action), Supergirl, and then Spider-Man Brand New Day. I kind of think Masters of the Universe is cooked in this box office environment. HOWEVER, it won’t be lost on people streaming. I predict Amazon is going to make MINT streaming this movie.

Do you agree or disagree? Let me know in the comments!

Masters of the Universe- Thoughts on MOTU story iterations before offering a review of the new movie.

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See my video review of the 2026 Masters of the Universe movie HERE. (Spoiler warning)

I am going to give you a quick synopsis of my thoughts on every iteration of this fiction. Just a couple of sentences before I drop a review of the new movie with spoilers. This might help someone understand my take on things.

This is my copy of the mini comic collection. I have several of these modern “coffee table” kinds of books, but I have read through this one several times. It is always entertaining!
  • Minicomics generation 1- “Mini-Eternia” or “Miniternia.” These original stories were wonderfully barbaric, with more violence than we would see until the 1987 movie and some truly twisted plot points more fit for adults than kids, but sold to children no less. No Prince Adam. No Orko. No Cringer. I love most of these for their violence and weirdness.
I don’t have a whole lot of these mini comics (I do have a few…) but the large images and print of the minicomics collection is superior to the SpartanNerd’s old eyes.
  • Filmation- He-Man and the Masters of the Universe was the beginning-of-the-end for Filmation studios…a legendary studio that competed with Hanna Barbara in the more “budget” style of making cartoons with stock images. (Rather than through-drawn like Disney or Warner Bros.) As such, the animation was the peak of that cartoon factory’s life, and was truly wonderful by the time they were animating their final show, She-Ra: Princess of Power. These shows were light-hearted and aimed at a cautious children’s market with a demographic at the time of 2-10 year olds. And this, along with the toys, is where the CORE MOTU fans really are at. Very important when discussing everything else here on this blog entry and discussing the 2026 movie.
Image from superherotoystore.com Never have shopped there. If you are reading this, you likely know what it is all about.
  • Minicomics generation 2- These really are just smaller Filmation cartoons, but they are more laser-focused on representing current toys on the shelf. This is the nature of how they were made…kind of in the packaging department. So a wave would come out with a few new comics that represented the other stuff in the wave. They all generally kept the schema of Filmation in mind, each having a transformation sequence and most having at least Teela, Man-At-Arms, Orko, and Skeletor.
Multi-Bot is one of my favorites!
  • Print Media- These are all of the “other books.” DC Comics had a line that was closer to Miniternia. Marvel had a line that was closer to Filmation. The He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Magazine (American) also featured more of a Filmation style. This was more blatantly an advertisement, however. I like looking at these for nostalgia’s sake. Not only is it He-Man centric, it also brings up old cartoons, snacks, movies, etc. in the environment it was printed. (like old comics do). There were storybooks also, and these didn’t have ads! Golden Books, and others. Usually Earl Norem did the cover, which to me was worth the price. They were all Filmation-context, but usually had even more outlandish fantasy settings and problems. There was also a record-with-storybook. I loved the art in this as a child!
I still have my original copy of this from when I was a child, but it is missing the cover! I bought this complete copy at a comic con. Earl Norem did most of the cover art on these books. The image below is from the back cover, and shows off Time Trouble, one of my favorite He-Man images.
  • Non-USA Media- I don’t know a whole lot about this, but the regulations overseas (not-in-the-USA) were different, for instance Teenage Mutant HERO Turtles because the word NINJA was banned for children in Britain. For Masters of the Universe, they printed most of the same mini-comics but with localized language. There was an entirely different British magazine, and notably made use of a letters-from-Scrollos column that had a different take on characters that have been folded into the overall lore. Also, Goat Man was a prominent character in a British storybook. If you have heard of Anti-Eternia He-Man, that is from German audiobooks that were read on-air over the radio.
My VHS copies of the Masters of the Universe 1987 movie and an unopened Mike Young Productions He-Man and the Masters of the Universe “The Courage of Adam,” which was the opening story arc.
  • 1987 Masters of the Universe movie- Sometimes called Masters of the Universe: The Movie. This one is its own thing. It threw out much of the Filmation story and became more of a science-fiction action film. The story wasn’t driven by He-Man so much…to me it feels like the “side characters” of Julie (Courtney Cox) and Kevin (Robert Duncan McNeil) were the leads, followed by Skeletor (Frank Langella) and Evil-Lyn (Meg Foster) and then Gwildor (Billy Barty) and then He-Man (Dolph Lundgren) as points to drive the story forward. It filled a lot of holes that budgets couldn’t address at the time in ways that have a cult following similar to the Mini-Ternia crowd commands. No Orko, so we have Gwildor. Most of the story takes place on Earth…in LA apparently. No Battle Cat. No classic vehicles. There are Star Wars-like Storm Troopers. The villains include Beast Man, Karg, Blade, and Saurod…Blade is pretty cool, and Beast Man is scary. The other two are “just there”. The real gem here is Langella’s Skeletor. You can see a my full analysis from a couple of years ago HERE.
I own this newspaper strip collection also. It would run everyday, with Sunday’s edition in color.
  • Masters of the Universe Newspaper Comics- I never saw these “in the wild” as a kid…our news didn’t print them. As an adult, I have the collected edition…and talk about a narrative that is kind of hard to follow. The problem is they have to often stop and remind the reader what is happening…you might have missed the day prior. So there is this slow movement on what happens in the story…it takes awhile to get through an arc. I have read two of these arcs, and I find it tedious and exhausting. However, there are plenty of funny moments!
  • New Adventures- As a kid we had a couple of the toys, and the first mini-comic that had Grayskull destroyed and replaced with Starship Eternia. That is all I have to say about it. I have never watched the show ever except for possibly a snip of an episode. Some of the character designs are cool, but those toys were very different from the originals. And destroying Grayskull is akin to killing Optimus Prime.
  • Mike Young Productions He-Man and the Masters of the Universe (200x)- There was a long break with no He-Man action after New Adventures flopped out. And this is what scares fans like me. I remember seeing the commercial for this well before it came out, and was completely overwhelmed! But then I couldn’t see it all until it was released on DVD because of the way Cartoon Network scheduled it. It was done in the style of “American Anime” which was a fad for cartoons for awhile. (Nickelodeon’s Avatar: The Last Airbender is an example). The designs were updated to be more EXTREME. I liked the tight continuity…kind of like three or five episode story arcs. And they built out a new map of Eternia with new races and creatures. Of everything, I like this about as much as I do Filmation, but some people criticize it for that forced style. (Hyper detail, hyper sexualized female characters, and lots of weapon twirling).
  • Masters of the Universe Classics bios- This was Scott Neitlich’s baby. He tried to pull everything together into a concise story. (In Transformers they call this “aligned continuity”). I feel like he did pretty good, but took a lot of flack from fans also. This was Scott giving everyone his “head canon”, but people like to make up their own…and that is one of the criticisms that his ideas were printed on the backs of official products. But he was successful enough to use this as a platform to introduce new action figures. Some were from “development hell” like Dare (He-Man’s son), and some were new ideas, the best of which had to be Draego Man, and the worst…probably The Unnamed One (Dark Orko). By the way…the current line of Origins figures…these are similar characters…brought about from production sketches, discarded stories, etc.
  • Modern Comics- DC had a good long run alongside the Classics line that was its own story. I have this entire collection, and love how they explored the Snake Men and the Evil Horde more in depth. If you see Despara, this is a character born from DC comics. (This is Force Captain Adora remixed into a much darker design). They also began the comics crossovers mostly using the artist Freddy Williams II. Dark Horse has been doing Masters comics for the past couple of years. Several of the crossover series feel a little “bad” to me sometimes, especially the Thundercats one. Dark Horse currently has a new ongoing comic with a new story that begins with “The Sword of Flaws,” which is kind of a story about Skeletor’s sword.
One of my prized comics! Not many people have this one…I was sent this cover when I complained about the issue that I subscribed to being ruined in the mail. DC sent this one…and I have never seen another.
Freddie Williams II has been my favorite MOTU artist for awhile, though he is stepping back. He describes his process as taking sharpies and letting the ink bleed and smear on the paper. The other stack is my complete collection of DC.
  • Netflix She-Ra and the Princesses of Power- I have watched most of a season of this and find it enjoyable. You don’t see many modern “magical girl” shows…this one has Adora saying “For the Honor of Grayskull! (What does that even mean?)” Which sums up the relationship of this show and other Masters of the Universe property. Netflix “divorced” it from the larger universe because of rights issues. You still have Hordak and the Evil Horde. The relationship between Catra and She-Ra is a main story in this show.
Image from The Verge.
  • Kevin Smith’s Masters of the Universe: Revelation season 1 and 2, and Revolution- What Kevin did was TICK EVERYONE OFF with the first five episodes. First of all, this is the most beautifully animated cartoon of Masters of the Universe. It is like Filmation 5.0, but with no-holds-barred in the fighting. And there is an all-star voice cast, including Mark Hammil as Skeletor and Henry Rollins as Tri-Klops. Oh yeah…William Shatner as Keldor. Making this the first project with Luke Skywalker and Captain Kirk together! But back to him ticking us off. Imagine…the guy who created the movie “Dogma” making people mad…It was like he did EVERYTHING to rub everyone wrong in the first five episodes, including killing off He-Man and Skeletor right at the beginning. And then when the five episodes were done, there was a followup episode where he appears to be high as a kite and gloating about it! (Netflix took that down pretty quickly). There was so much hatred for it, it seems that Netflix paid attention and had Smith rectify a lot of what was done in Season 2. But I have to question the heart of that. If Smith wanted Teela and Andra to be a thing, or for Andra to be the next He-Man, that should have been his creative license. But at the end of the day it is all about the Benjamins I supposed, and making people mad doesn’t sell toys or keep people streaming. The Revolution show…now this was a beautiful follow-up. And it wraps up all of the Filmation/Kevin Smith storyline neatly with He-Man and Tri-Sorceress Teela apparently husband and wife. I have become a fan of Smith’s whole project, and wish he would make more using the cliffhanger of the Horde and Despara, but it doesn’t look like that is going to happen. One thing is certain, I would purchase figures of the Tri-Sorceress and He-Man in their design that appears at the end. Also, the Sorceress of Havoc is an AWESOME design.
Image from CBR of Kevin Smith’s Masters of the Universe project.
  • CGI Netflix show- Never watched it. Ram Ma’am? Orko is a robot? Hard pass on this one.

I have seen the new movie twice as of this writing, and have a review with spoilers coming soon. Thanks for reading!

MASTERVERSE New Eternia Teela- SpartanNerd Unboxing and Review

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See the video review of this figure HERE.

I ordered MASTERVERSE New Eternia Teela from BigBadToyStore when she was first released, and this time I did something different…I ordered three other things that I sent to the “Pile of Loot.” So lots of reviews coming soon! (New Etheria Hordak, New Eternia Cobra Kahn, and Mythic Legions Belualyth…I will update links as I review them)

And why did I order this Teela, when I already had three other modern Teela figures? Keep reading!

PACKAGING

In this box you can see her very well. And she is looking upwards.

Teela came in the typical “Transformers” style packaging. (I use that term in reference to the way Hasbro has been doing TF toys for awhile…it increases the artwork and minimizes the blister plastic). We have a good image of her on the front holding the Staff of Ka…but you could mistake her for rowing a boat! After all, there is a Merfolk warrior looking on. (Aquaticans, I believe in Motu lore). As the image wraps around you can see her golden horse that was depicted in the early mini comics. (OK, so if Mattel doesn’t give us such a horse, this is the Four Horsemen’s chance to capitalize on what people surely will want!) Also in that wraparound image, we have an image of Castle Grayskull, but in 200x style! And we all know, Mattel and Mondo are both going to be issuing some 200x style toys. (This is a whole blog entry itself when more details get revealed).

The other side has the library image for people who store their action figures in the box, with her having windblown hair and wearing the “warrior goddess” snake headdress. And so we have homage to four different iterations of Masters of the Universe…200x with the castle, mini comics with the golden horse, filmation with the main presentation, and vintage toy with the hooded look.

The back has kind of generic photoshop of the figure, and just like the Green Goddess and Evil-Lyn, they have “airbrushed” off the seam at the thigh cut. We all know it’s there. Come on Mattel, why lie to us? Teela has a bio indicating that she has embraced her destiny as “the avatar” of “The Goddess of New Eternia.” Underneath this bio there are three cross-sell images that in addition to this figure includes Hordak and Kobra Kahn. I suppose the other figure in this was is New Eternia Moss Man, but he was offered only through Mattel Creations, mostly to Club Grayskull members at that. (The cross-sell functions for retail store shelves).

WHAT DO WE GET IN THE BOX

I told you there were seems in the thighs!
  • New Eternia Teela figure
  • Snake headdress
  • shield
  • Staff of Ka
  • Warrior Spear
  • a pair of punching fists

We have the accessories here for two different looks: “Captain of the Guard” and “Warrior Goddess.” And this starts to get into the weeds of who even is this character. Most people will remember Teela from the Filmation Cartoon and other iterations (200x) as the Captain of the Guard. And the presentation here is clearly homage to the vintage action figure, being a repaint of MASTERVERSE New Eternia Evil-Lyn with a different head. (In the vintage line, it was the other way around!) The whole Warrior Goddess thing comes from the early mini comics, which is basically an entirely different story from the Filmation show. When I was a kid I was confused by this, but you know…pretty much since I was in high school and began to get back into Masters of the Universe that there were different forces writing different stories has been clear. As Warrior Goddess, in the first issue she was green. (This is why I tend to call MASTERVERSE Revolution Sorceress Teela “The Green Goddess.” This is a fan nickname, like Baby Yoda for instance). In subsequent issues she was colored caucasian, and sometimes blonde instead of ginger. There is this whole story about Skeletor cloning her to be his bride also, and so that is why there is a Sorceress and more of a princess Teela. (It feels so weird typing all that. The mini comics were indeed different!)

Yep. This actually happened in the mini comics story “The Tale of Teela.” Funny how Skeletor says his plan is “simple.” I didn’t imagine all of that about Dolly the Sheep in the 1990’s did I? Also, this is a creeptastic plan. And this story was meant for CHILDREN TO READ. This story kind of explains why Teela has blonde hair and the goddess has red hair and wears that headdress. I’m pretty sure after this story, they began to use the word Sorceress to soften the religious connotations.

The vintage action figure came with this hood and snake staff, as well as a sword I believe. I never had a female action figure until I was 12 years old and got Evil-Lyn for Christmas, so I only know what I have seen in vintage toy stores. But I can see how all of this can be confusing for who this character actually is. But it is just fine to think of her as “He-Man’s girlfriend”.

(In the newest Netflix cartoon, Revolution, Teela and He-Man are practically married by the power of Grayskull at the end! If they make figures of this, I am the first in line! The designs were so pretty!)

FIGURE REVIEW

Well, I am at the point of wondering what the greatest action figure of the year is, and I was starting to think they couldn’t be better than MASTERVERSE New Eternia Evil-Lyn, but Teela has proven me wrong!

Teela jumped right into the den of zombies and skeletons! Notice Skeletor’s Staff of Ka being very large and unpainted BOO!

She has the same body as Evil-Lyn, only painted with lighter colors as Teela. The same boots, arm bracers, everything. She has a different skirt piece, and this is a point to bring up because in my figure, this was flattened down far too much, and also askew from the position it should be in. I was able to fix it, but if you are a mint in box collector, look out!

So this sculpt and paint are brilliant. Maybe the best part is that she looks like a real woman with maybe legs that are only slightly too long…(Mattel Barbie dolls famously have this too, so…) In other words, no hyper-sexualized design like something from Street Fighter. The upper body is tastefully presented, and that is kind of refreshing.

Her face sculpt and paint. The image on the back makes her look like the face is more round than it is. She has her hair pulled back in a ponytail, which I guess gives her a high forehead look. But her eyes…They are done very pretty. But I asked the SpartanWife if she thought the same thing as I do. I think she is looking upwards? So for Force Captain, this looks kind of strange if she is just standing there, but not if she is stabbing something with that spear. For the hooded goddess look, this looking up looks more spiritually powered up and otherworldly appropriate.

ACCESSORIES

This Teela proves that Evil-Lyn didn’t come with enough stuff. Sure, you could argue that cape was something, but really it was inexcusable. Teela’s accessory count is very welcome in the MASTERVERSE line. They are bronzy-gold in the same color as the highlights painted on the main figure. BUT…this means the Green Goddess’ Staff of Ka remains the best of the three we have been given. (Skeletor’s throne came with one also)

The Green Goddess’ Staff of Ka is still the best one we’ve been given in MASTERVERSE.

This shield looks very royal and feminine at the same time, and has that barbarian spike in the middle. The spear as well looks like it belongs in the throne room. The only paint of the accessories that I see is the spot of green on the eyes of the snake mask and a brighter colored ring around the “neck” on the Staff of Ka.

The headdress fits loosely to her face, and yet feels snug. How did they do that? I managed to get the Masters of the Unvierse Classics Weapons Pack snake armor on the earlier MASTERVERSE Revelation Teela figure only with a hairdryer. (Granted, it was for a different line…) Teela’s tiara is hidden perfectly by the mask when she has it on, and it really kind of is that she is presented as a different character. A person could be justified in having two of these! (I won’t. I’ll wait on Sorceress of Havoc to come out…that will be AWESOME if they do that!)

Four Teela figures. From top left clockwise. MASTERVERSE New Eternia Teela, MASTERVERSE Revolution Sorceress Teela, Masters of the Universe Classics Battleground Teela (with Revelation alternate head), and MASTERVERSE Revelation Teela kitbash, with Classics weapons and Super7 Ultimates! Conan the Barbarian ceremonial snake dagger.

In the above picture I have kitbashed some MOTUC with MASTERVERSE. Ultimately, the earlier MASTERVERSE Teela seems a lot more “babyish.” You can also see the improvements they have made in the knee joints so they look less lumpy. I heard another reviewer complain about having single jointed elbows, but I think that is the best choice…the arms just look better this way.

SPARTANNERD RATING OF MASTERVERSE NEW ETERNIA TEELA

I can’t say enough good stuff about the sculpt. (1 point). The paint is very good even if the choice to have her looking upwards is questionable…but she isn’t derp. (1 point). Very good articulation and she stands very well with no stupid problems. (1 point). Her accessory count is very good also. (1 point).

And OK. This is my new “go-to” Teela. I am retiring the kitbash that I have used forever. I’ll keep using MOTUC Battleground Teela for that even more barbarian “skimpy” look, but this figure is downright beautiful, and fun to play with to boot. So with the “feels point” I award MASTERVERSE New Eternia Teela a 5/5. Do you agree or disagree, Hub City Geeks? Let me know in the comments!

Super7 Ultimates! Conan Battle of the Mounds Valeria (Spirit) and MASTERVERSE New Eternia Teela. Valeria is a spiritual descendant of the Masters of the Universe Classics.